Poem -

Chiding in my Chariot

Chiding in my Chariot

No need to ever reprimand me or berate
My conscience is keen, burning me at the stake
When I love, I feel deeply, beyond my control
Even withstanding spurn’s hurt that shatters my soul

When guilt sets in, humiliation carries it
My mind is unkind, chiding in my chariot
Racing round and round, in a Circus Maximus
The stadium in my brain retains the lack of trust

Memories stab like gladiators, going in for the kill
My horse chariot charges forward, spinning wheels
Will I ever conquer my fears in life’s staged race?
My conscience sears my spirit at a steady pace

Intentions of desire, burn my scruples with fire
The flames escalate my pain and never expire
Where do I belong when nothing can bury it?
I punish myself, chiding in my chariot 

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Comments

author
sparrowsong

Hello Sis Cherie...

​​​​​​I thought about this and if God didn't exist and we had full control of our soul I wonder if we would make better decisions for ourselves...

Because, I know believing God is there for the final act and the final say...

I would like to think I would make better choices with no regrets...

If we can't live right to God how can we live right to ourselves and make sure our Soul has the best possible future?

Not much difference if God says don't swim it's Sharks feeding time and we do it anyway and get angry because, it chewed a leg off...

Then it's up to us to to research and understand when And get hungry...

If we don't know, there's an easy way and a hard way to find out...

Great write!

Thank you for sharing...

Love n Hugs...

sparrowsong

 

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author
sparrowsong

P.S. My device decided now it was going to write itself...

I think you know what I was trying to say...

😊

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author
Cherie Sumner-Taylor

Hi sis....You are exactly right!  If we just listened to God with full trust in Him for our lives, we would ever ever make decisions that go against His will.  The problem in life is that we do have free will, and make choices that sometimes hurt us or we get hurt at no fault of our own but how we are treated by choices of others, and we still have to pick up the pieces of our life and keep on keeping on.  This poem is a metaphor using a warrior in a chariot at war being attacked being compared to one being hard on themselves, feeling attacked in life for the way they love deeply, and having angst and rebuking the world and punishing themselves for feeling alienated.  It is an older poem that I reworked to make a bit clearer than the first version I did a few years ago.  Thank you for reading and commenting. xo  Love n Hugs, ;)

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author
A Lonely Journey

Hi Cheerie, 
What a great write, albeit a painful one. If anyone in this crazy world does not deserve pain, it's you, yet I could see you punishing yourself because you're far too nice to be mad at someone else. Don't ever be hard on yourself, you're the best person, and one of God's finest creations. I think you have more feelings than anyone in the world, and I hope, from this moment on, they're all happy ones. 
Fantastic writing, but be cheerie, Cheerie. 
Love and hugs, 
Matthew. 

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author
Cherie Sumner-Taylor

Hi  Matthew....Thank you.  This is an older poem that I did a re-write of it, trying to polish it up a bit.  It was written about pain from a past that did cause me to punish myself.  I do feel very deeply and hurt from being sensitive to my world.  You are very sweet to wish me happy moments in life...I wish the same for you.  Thank you for just being such a good friend with all your support and kind words.  I am more of a "cheerie" person now.  Lol  Love n Hugs, Cheerie/Cherie ;)

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author
A Lonely Journey

You're amazing. 
My favorite thing in the world is to make nice people feel great about themselves, so I'm thrilled to be able to be a support on here, because you're the nicest person around. 
L&H, 
M. 

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author
Cherie Sumner-Taylor

Awww...Thank you, Matthew.  You have been so supportive as both a peer on here and my friend.  It means so much.  I enjoy your poetry too and love the positive energy on Cosmo from people like you. 
Love n Hugs

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author
RRG (Rebecca)

Cherie this is so good. Visually visceral lol. I love your spin on this subject. Five stars and pinned. :) Really, wow. Blessings.

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author
Cherie Sumner-Taylor

Hi Rebecca.  Thank you.  I am excited that you pinned this and that you liked this poem that well.  I quite often write with metaphors to create imagery to make an impact on a subject I am emphasizing.  I appreciate your kind support. xo ;)

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author
GREG TUCKER

 A perfect Journey you have taken me on.
 

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author
Cherie Sumner-Taylor

Hi Greg...Thank you.  This was a metaphorical write comparing the battle like  a  Roman gladiator in a chariot in the fighting arena racing around to the thoughts, guilt, and regrets battling in one's head, punishing one's self.  I am glad you felt the journey of it.  xo ;)

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author
Cherie Sumner-Taylor

Hi Greg...Thank you so much!  I hope the imagery in this one gave the feeling of facing a battle in one's mind.....going in circles like the gladiator circling in a chariot preparing for battle.  I always appreciate your kind support. xo ;)

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author
Larry Ran

My Dear Cherie,

What a beautiful, metaphoric masterpiece!  
All "thumbs up" for this one.

Chariots of fire
In my innermost moments
Take me to my dreams

All my love,
Larry xxx

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author
Cherie Sumner-Taylor

Thank you, Larry.  I think it is in our convictions that we make changes in life so we can live with the past mistakes but surge forward into the battles we must face....but with hope.  Thank you for the awesome Haiku!  I wish I could write short poems that have impact like you do.  I appreciate them so much.  Thank you.  xo Love n Hugs

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author
Larry Ran

My Dear Cherie,

I am the Master of "short poems", but you are the Master of long ones.

Love,
Larry xxx

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author
Cherie Sumner-Taylor

I don't think I am a master, but I am definitely improving from where I have been.  I keep learning and having fun writing.  I do appreciate all of your kind support that motivates me to keep sharing. xo  ;)

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author
Marion Price

It's all been said above Cherie...fantastic! 💕

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author
Cherie Sumner-Taylor

HI Marion...lol....Thank you.  It makes me feel good that you liked it.  This was an older poem that I reworked and I think it turned out much better than the original one.  Your support means a lot. xo ;)

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author
Marion Price

Cherie, your work is very beautiful,  full of emotion and very romantic, I love it. I also admire that you can have older poems and take time to rework them. Mine come out in a manic tumble that absolutely have to be finished immediately or I never go back to them...then I dry up and I wish I'd taken more time. Your work is a lesson to me....you are already a master of the craft 💕

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author
Cherie Sumner-Taylor

Hi Marion. Thank you.  Sometimes, I go back to my older work and it is so bad to me that I do not revive them, lol,   But there are some that are worthy to be given a face lift and show their true potential.  This particular one,  always liked the title and intent, but I gave it a good overhaul in content.  It just depends.  I always hope that I will continue to get better, and as I do, I can recognize former writes that could be made much better.  I think we all have out styles that work for us.  I like your spontaneous writes that tumble out!  Thank you for such  kind words of support.  It keeps me motivated  xo ;)  

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