Author's Note: Hey guys, sometimes I write silly things, but in no way mean to demean the integrity of the site, and the beautiful poetry on here. It's just an attempt to bring some levity to the sorrow this life often brings, and maybe make someone smile. I was on another site, briefly, before this(this one's better), and if I wrote a humorous attempt, it was often met with crickets chirping loudly, and maybe one comment, from a guy who was on-line looking for the phone number for Applebees, and accidentally put in 'dorky humor'(it happens more than you know). Anyway, I hope no one is offended.
Also, 2 people on here, whose names will not be mentioned(PoetessDarkly and Silent Screamer), forced me to post it! I swear! They threatened me at poetic pencil-point, saying they will not comment on any more of my sad attempts at prose, and yet I still have to continue to pay them for those services!(they drive a hard bargain).
Anyway, I apologize in advance.
In order to break up the monotony of my poetry, I have included a listing of interesting facts about nature, and it's inhabitants. I have always enjoyed factoids, and I thought you cool people would also.
It just amazes me that:
-Most elephants weigh less than the tongue of a blue whale.
-A moth has no stomach.
-A whale's heart beats only 9 times a minute.
Wow! Here are some others that I believe I also heard, and think are true, but don't quote me on them, because I'm a dork: (and, PS., sorry for the attempt at humor, but if we don't laugh once in a while, we'll spend all day crying!):
Interesting Facts About Nature by MZ.
1. Mickey Mouse, before he was Steamboat Willie, and eventually the Mickey we love today, came over on a ship from Cambodia, and was known as Plaguey Pete!
2. The platypus has 17 hearts!
3. Godzilla could actually speak fluent Japanese, but chose to make loud squeaking/ squawking noises instead.
4. In Armenia, a female yak is called a 'Hoochie Coochie Mama.'
5. The hyena, though often seen laughing, enjoys sad music, and is described by jungle mates as having 'the tears of a clown.'
6. Scientists in Bangladesh taught a gorilla to use a toilet in the wild, but the experiment was scrapped when he kept forgetting to put the seat down for the female gorillas.
7. A walrus' tusks can grow to be 40 feet long, and the full grown adult walrus can weigh up to 700 million tons!
8. Sheep are exactly the same as humans, with the exception of their physiological, mental and television preference differences!
9. The common barnyard chicken in Chernobyl, Russia has 13 beaks!
10. A large group of manatee is called a Flubber.
11. The largest dog in the world is not Clifford, as you would expect, but Marmaduke, who once ballooned up to 400 lbs. when he was taking Prednisone for an intestinal disorder!
12. A female Polar bear, in the wild, will put on socks if the temperature reaches -40 below zero in Antarctica!
13. The Sea Lion(the thing that looks like a seal) is not at all related to the lion family! And is actually more closely related to the Stevens family of West Yonkers.
14. Sea-Monkeys, as believed more recently, are not actually some type of little shrimp, but are actually a little family of smiling creatures with three pointy things on their heads, a father, a mother with a red bow in her hair, and 2 kids, just like the comic book picture!
15. Gorilla poop can now be manufactured synthetically in a laboratory setting!
16. While it's true that a leopard cannot change it's spots, it can change into a sharp, polka-dot patterned jacket by Calvin Klein.
17. Cows are actually lactose intolerant!
18. Scientists in Norwich, NY have uncovered evidence that dogs don't urinate in certain spots to 'mark their territory' but more because they 'really had to go.'
19. Squirrels have the unique ability to hide their nuts.
20. A human being could actually crawl through the veins of a blue whale, but only after receiving express written consent from the animal, to do so.
21. A fruit bat eats 60,000 lbs. of mosquitos a day!
22. Ancient cave drawings have revealed that dinosaurs were displeased with the name given them because it sounded too much like female talk-show host Dinah Shore!
23. The sloth sleeps about 20 hours out of every day! (He spends the other 4 hours complaining how he ‘didn’t sleep that well because his tree was lumpy’, etc., and ‘how tired he is’ to his sloth mates).
24. Yogi and Boo Boo Bear are not as pleasant in actual life as they are on their cartoon, and Yogi often rips the arm off a camper while Boo Boo steals the pick-a-nick basket. Ranger Smith is also not as nice as depicted, and oft times will shoot them with a high caliber rifle.
25. The common house fly’s eyes have 629 sides to them, but he still requires bifocal glasses to read his prescription bottle!
26. The duck, in Victorian Times(before it was called a duck) was called a ‘Bend Over To Avoid That Object Hurling At Your Head!’, but the name was changed when the old joke: ‘Who stepped on a Bend Over To Avoid That Object Hurling At Your Head!?’(when someone farted) fell flat because it took too long to tell.
27. Baboons are not born with bare bottoms, but actually shave their intergluteal cleft with a sharp rock in the privacy of their own jungle lair!