A Hole In My Soul. Mother To An Angel.

The Doctors started talking about survival chances,
when it's your own flesh and blood, that's when the pain enhances.
They told me on the very first day my daughter wouldn't make it,
Hearing them words every day over, I just couldn't take it.
Anyone in the room that made eye contact could see my heart breaking,
I wished for it all to just be a nightmare in the hope I might awaken.

I felt my whole world crumble with every tear streaming down my face,
piece by piece I felt everything fall apart and fall out of place.
Every day now I feel the empty space,
It's so wrong I wish I could fix it and tie it all back together simply like a lace,
but is isn't that simple, Sapphire you will always be here like a never ending trace.

The emptiness inside is like a deep black hole,
It'll always be there so raw and sore cutting deep into my soul.
The pain is so heavy but empty and cold,
The pain of a bereaved mother is hardly ever told.

Here I am trying to tell parts of my tale,
but unfortunately this ship will never sail.
I still sometimes think, is it my fault, did I fail?
I'll still love and miss you Sapphire just as much when I'm old and frail.

My beautiful diamond in the sky,
my perfect little angel baby fly high.
You gave a strong amazing 30 day fight,
but the angels called you back into the starry night.
I'll miss you always and I'll love you forever,
your name, existence and memory will never fade, NEVER.
I always think and speak of you, you're always cherished and you I treasure,
that's Mummy's promise to you Sapphire until we're reunited again together.