A hurt filled disguise

Even if you tried / you won't succeed / for all the times I've lied / for all my moments of greed / 
Pushing those Away/ the ones I hold most dear / was commonplace for me / my one true biggest fear /
cheating, stealing and manipulation/ the tricks that are up my sleeve / 
dont try to understand me/ it's better just to leave/ 
I isolate and hide / I dont let anyone in / I can do this on my own / I'm used to all my sin / make sure no one is around/ so begins my dark temptations/ as reality slips away / and the last of my loved ones patience/ a letter to my left side / the phone to my right / do I try to reach out?/ or end the endless fight/  no one left to try and stop me / why bother to even try / there's no more light left in my eyes / it's my hurt filled disguise