A prayer before silence

Oh mother, 
Don't cry for me when am gone.
For am not worthy of your love, 
Not worthy of the care you endowed upon me all these years. 
The grace of your presence have always enlightened me to be virtuous, 
Yet I've committed sins and broken hearts. 
I've grown up into something you might have never wished for. 
Nearing 26 and barely achieved anything worth mentioning. 
Isolated and lonely is what I choose to be. 
With millions perishing across the globe these days, 
All I can do is sit back and mourn over their demise. 
Embrace me into your arms oh mother nature, 
Make me reborn smart and wise. 
So that I can bloom again from the gloomy shades of life and improvise...