A sworn regret

In days to come,  I know I will regret
not sitting by her bed,  just to regale
a hurried rhyme, or let go a soft tale, 
all while in thought,  I knew her days were set. 

Oh my dear, where fly you now,  I wonder.
Is life a better place where you now shine? 
I hear your voice commingled within mine.
It comes in droves, hitting me like thunder. 

Do you smile on the life which I have built? 
Or have you cast your eyes aside in shame? 
I heard all life was just a vicious game. 
For which the ending prize was often guilt. 

Oh what of I? What am I to become? 
I let her down. Abandoning my mum.