Poem -
" ATTEMPTED SUICIDE "
He stumbles into the kitchen
After a night of ceaseless debauchery
He hates himself, for what he's done
And what he hasn't
He grabs the biggest kitchen knife
Stabs it deep, into his wrist
He holds his wrist out in front of himself
And drizzles his name across the floor
In bright red blood
It reads.......T>>>>O>>>>N>>>>>>Y
He awakens to light so bright
That he shields his eyes and cries out
But no one hears his words
Floating,
He knows that he is alive
But nothing like before,
The man he was
Is gone
Forever,
And remains seared
Deep,
Into his memory
In bloody letters,
Across the whiteness,
Of,
The kitchen floor....
Tony Taylor. (Chicago)
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Comments
Tony, you're scaring me. Please tell me this isn't true.
Intense write, that makes the heart beat harder.
Hey thanx KIMMY!! ......don't worry.......... this is a true experience........... but it happened in 1984.........and there's a LOT more to the story.......... but what it came down to was that I was hurting people around me........ not physically but making them worry about me........ and I felt there was no way out.......... But God sent an angel and I was found in time before bleeding to death by my step mother ........who came home early from work because she had a strange feeling that something was wrong.............I know it was God doing his unfathomable work.......... because she was not supposed to be home for hours............ crazy right?........... anyway, I appreciate the concern my friend............. you're a cool guy!!............ Love and Rockets!!.............T xo
Not to worry my friend!!......... smiles..........T xo
Hey Tony, this is a beautiful piece. As I read it I felt your pain. You have a way of making your writing so real. A psychiatrist once told me that most people have at least pictured their suicide, mentioning most of the time those thoughts were completely innocent. And yet with other people, who are in fact suicidal tend to show new habits. I always thought psychiatry is pretty interesting. Im glad that time in your life has past. Cheers friend
Long whistle............fading......ok wow, iam shocked. It takes some serious negative energy to go that far and I don't need details to know that low point, but am truly grateful to hear of your shining light angel of a stepmother and her saving grace feelings, or else we would have been robbed of a great poet. I can imagine this experience has changed you in such a way that keeps you from those depths. Very real dark write, love you brother.
Geez DEVON!! ~ Thanx so much brother......... that's one of the coolest things anyone has EVER said to me.......... you really chose perfect words ~ my stepmother IS a shining light angel ~ She's Chinese and always had weird metaphysical stuff going on with her........... she saved my life AND afterword she saved my self esteem just by being the "Shining Light Angel" that she is......... I'm going to tell her of her new ~ and well deserved ~ Title, from Sir Devon LaPorte...........THANK YOU D!!...........love, back at ya !!.........ttyl............T xo
This is a beautiful but brutal truth, and the brutality and the beauty is in the truth of it. I have been there myself after I lost my Andrew, he dragged me back.....We all have our different reasons but God is supreme and he takes care of us in ways we can`t even begin to understand on this plane. He still has a lot of work for you to do yet my darling as I have told you many times over the last 3 years of our friendship and you know that I`m here with you every step of the way and always will be....I love my Beasty Boy!!!.....G xx
This biographical piece was written by a warrior! You are a survivor, my friend. Continue to replenish your armament for the war is unrelenting. Happy you are still here!