Beautiful water

when you look at me, what do you see?
i know what i want you to see, i want you to see me,
the person that i have always been, i want you to see my soul and my heart and the hair i spent hours making perfect just so other people can look at it,

yet when i look into your eyes, i see a challenge,
i see you look at me as if my clothes are an endless lock that you would like to break open, 
in your eyes i have no soul,
you dont care how my heart beats without rhythm because your voice is making me nervous,

and my hair... well,
i don't think you can even see it because your eyes haven't noticed my face yet, because men like you don't care about the effort women put into the hair on our heads,
as long as we take off the hair between our legs.

when you say things to my ears, its not aimed to reach my heart,
you want it to reach my brain to confuse its thoughts and make me think i am safe,
and when you dance with me and your hands are on my back, the real destination for those hands are in my pants,

stop toying with my mind for my eyes cant seem to stop crying,
i feel like I'm lost at sea with all these endless waves of emotions caused by sharks,
when i take a sip of the water i am disgusted, but i am so dehydrated that i keep drinking until i am so sick i cant move,
you are the ocean,
you drew me in with your beauty and your smell,
and left me to drown after abandoning me without even leaving my dignity or an explanation.

i know your not wondering but i made sure to tell you that i made it home,
i messaged you everyday even though your responses where quite so vague, yet my heart still seemed to flutter because today you bothered to respond with a 'hey'

little was i so to blind to know was that you just wanted me to leave you alone,
and act like your hands never connected with my innocents because it meant nothing to your mind,
and once again my eyes are left with not a soul in sight because i allowed it to reach out,
and received nothing but a blind crime.