Born Asleep

I’ve never felt happiness before
Until I seen they two blue lines
I was going to be a mum
You were the only thing on my mind.

If I ate food or drank juice 
I kept on been sick
Not one hour passed
That I wouldn’t vomit

Don’t worry they said 
It’s just morning sickness
My tiny bump grew 
But I ate less and less
My milk was forming in my chest

This was meant to be the happiest time 
Where I could bond with my bump 
And my health should be fine
Instead of this I was getting weaker in time

To see you on the monitor
When I went for my scan
I just wanted you here with me
So you were safe and in my hands

They told me you were healthy
And let me hear your heart 
Although they reassured me
I felt different from the start

I knew my baby wasn’t fine 
I knew that she was sick
By 4 months pregnant
I felt no movement or a kick

Again I beg the doctors
Please do something for my baby
But they just scanned my belly again
And sent us on our way

I started to look pregnant 
20 weeks & bump had grown
It was nice to see people noticed
 And passed commented I was showing

Then 2 weeks later 
My life fell apart
You were stillborn
We couldn’t hear your heart

We spent days with you in hospital
I didn’t want to let you go
Your forever in my thoughts Miah 
I just wanted to let you know.

Love you always ,

Mummy 

xxx