Poem -

Certain Decisions

Certain Decisions

and i know i can predict certain decisions,

but certains decisions turn into anticipation,

which form feelings of complications,

and then theres the loud boom in my heart,

this sensation that you were creating art,

an art inside me which was growing less than falling apart,

were you ashamed, is that it?

was i just a chew toy for you to chew and then spit?

was i a bit more like you said?

or was i a bit more in my head?

because there are nights when i think of you,

nights where i fear i won't make it through,

and then there are days,

days where i know I'll be okay,

where i feel the sun kiss my skin

this blooming feeling from within

but fuck, why did you have to be so lovely?

why did you have to stand out from humanity?

why did i choose you out of all the fish in the sea?

and how, how did it happen all so fast?

how are you already a haunting memory from the past?

how did you take my heart and shattered it to the last,

the last blood pumping beat

which pounded slowly and dyingly.

- r. a. s.

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