Come first of May.

Today I am sitting in the church
It is pungent with the fragrances
Of flowers and incense.
All the children are taking their
First communion.
I tell myself I am coming just to see them.
So beautiful with time an uncharted sea
lay before them full of 
romance and adventure.
I tell  myself that but I know it is a lie.
I came here to stop the wailing of
The monsters in my chest.
To find peace where only purity exist.
I wanted to return to the child I was
Before I had broken my body and spirit
with the storms of half of a lifetime. 
To return to simple things 
and my childhood innocence.
To repair the damage to my soul.
Perhaps looking forward again
to a uncharted future.
But I know it cannot be so.
That war is over
The battle fought and lost
and some battles
 can never be won