even if i try

i can’t even if i try, 
to explain the feelings that i hide
how can i tell you that i love you?
i can’t even if i try.
my eyes, express the feelings of my heart
you don’t realize that i can’t even if i try
the heart, it cries.
seeing you with someone;
someone who isn’t me.
is it really that hard to see?
we met, but didn’t unite
the heart; it griefs. 
but it doesn’t speak 
it holds back. 
these are strange circumstances
my dreams are woven around you
god knows why
but I can’t deny
even if i try
to explain why I love you.
you’ve been this wonderful feeling
and yet i still can’t call you mine.
and i know i can’t step out of line
but believe me, i can’t even if i try.
i've gone mad in silence 
my mind has become very violent
why don’t you understand
that i can’t.
i'm next to you
but still miles away.
i can’t bring myself up to say
how i love you.
i can’t even if i try.