finding me

Finding me

By

Jude Kyrie

When you look at me my love 
What do you really see? 
The ashes of a lost soul. 
I have no Phoenix to rise in me. 
Only a slow burning candle 
That one day will extinguish 
without notice. 

When you touch me 
What do you really feel.? 
I am like ice, so cold inside. 
I need to melt in the sunlight 
I want to let in your warmth. 
Before old age will 
extinguish my light.
To find out who I am.
Fill me with creativity
once again. 

When we talk my love 
What do you really hear? 
The musings of a wannabe poet 
Pouring mediocrity from 
A faded lexicon. 

Why do you still support me? 
A man who is calling  
for the candle to burn and release him. 
A boy still afraid of the darkness. 
A man-child needing your softness. 
Still seeking myself after forever. 

My dear Lord,
Oh God 
If you can still find me. 
In your deserts of the sands of time. 
Where I am but a grain of sand.
If I am not one of your lost souls .
Take me to a place where I can see. 
A mountain top, a clear sky, an eternity. 
And fill my soul with all that is you. 
And in the strongest holy truth. 
Tell me who I am.