Has anyone seen my peace of mind?

I looked under the bed, in the conors of rooms. I checked all my pockets, pulled out every drawer, it is just nowhere to be found. The last time i had it was, ohh ten years ago, I had it as i left my work that day, of that I am sure. Confident I walked down the street taking all in my stride. 

Evening plans of nice food, bath and bed made me smile until, other thoughts entered my head. "You cant do it, you ll never be good enough, they dont really like you, your getting fat, almost 40 and what have you got to show for it?" I cross the road the horn of a car and a scream of "GET OUT OF THE WAY" . You fool, you idiot, what are you doing?. My shoulders lowered, my walk began to change. A habit formed and loss of peace of mind gained. 

I lay awake at night and went over all I could never be, going over mistakes I had made, people who did not like me. What did they think of me? What would I do? How could I ever be good enough? I really had no clue. 

But then that day when looking one more time for what I truely believed I had lost, in my thoughts I found

I never lost it after all, I gave it away. To thoughts I should have weeded out and replaced, a thought an action a destiny. Years of habit of allowing them to master me. 

I choose to change my thoughts, I choose to believe in me. 

I never lost it after all, my peace of mind is up to me.