I am a Cancer. What did you expect?

Don't bite the hand that holds your secret
Don't think I'll just be quiet and keep it if you're just going to be cold towards me
You don't deserve my loyalty
I don't owe you ANYthing and keeping YOUR secret may cost ME EVERYTHING.. that I put into having trust gained by someone I love but they loved you first and no matter how much wrong you do at the end of the day they'll choose you over me
so is telling your secret worth her believing your lie and being torn from my side?
I don't want to keep it now not just out of spite but because it is killing me to see you have her in a way that I never will while you pretend to be innocent and lie.
And all at the same time you do not treat me right but I fight in my mind whether or not to shed light on your lie and rain on the parade of your charades. ..but maybe for your sake I haven't spake. But for the sake of my love I contemplate the weight of knowing being dumped onto her so she is not in the dark about the reason why you've changed and breaking our hearts. Maybe then I can have the relationship I signed up for. You and I. Not you and her and me if I'm lucky. Because if you knew what I knew and felt like I do in the position that I'm in..then you would be bothered too by keeping the secret of someone who is the way she is with me. In due time I will be free of the burden of loyalty to someone who is not loyal to me and I'm beginning to believe that I am being tested but I don't know on what terms. Are u mistreating me because you want me to tell your secret or are you waiting to see if I will hold my peace although you disturb it? Which one is it? What shall I do?
The vindictive scorn cancer inside me says "EXPOSE THE LIES!!!"
THE STRUGGLE IS REAL....