If my mirror talked

If my mirror could talk...
On the bad days it would say: 
"Are you really going to leave the house like that?"
"It doesn't even look like your hair has been brushed" 
​​​​​​" you are fat and ugly" 
       But on the good days it would say: 
"Wow your makeup looks good today" 
​​​​​​"Your butt looks good in those"
"that lipstick really makes your lips pop"
​   ​ ​...If only my mirror could talk