I'm aching...

Why do I feel tears welling up, when restless thoughts vibrate inside my emotion filled eyes 
I stand on my feet but clouded by all the voices that build up ammunition, ready to numb my infested head 
Within this world we are put on a pedestal, everybody is there to hold the torch, but in reality alone on the shelf 

Tears don't land far from your judgement 
I live without fear but not contentment 
You can derail from your own guilt 
The curse of your evil follows me still 

Wash me of my sins, pour your pure liquid over me 
Tell me of stories, a tale that shouted out to be free 
The biggest battle I've had is myself, and It's killing me 
If I pull the trigger, the white roses will bleed the days rain 
With every petal that may fall, so does my heart as i crawl 

I have 
No gun
No purpose 
For one
This is just
In me
Is the bible
The right book 
For me?
I'm aching
In my
Whole being
I just want
To be 
Free,
I want to be free...