Poem -

I'm deep and meaningful you know

I’m deep and meaningful you know.
Beneath this exterior shell is a deep and meaningful man.
I’ve got feelings,
I’ve got heart,
I’ve got everything but I’m falling apart.
I’ve got my family,
Well just me and my boys,
But now even that is torn like one off their toys....
Their mother left,
So 5 down to four.
She doesn’t  even realise the eternal damage,
To them,
She’s done,
From 2 years before.
Every step in life my boys take,
 I’ll be right there...
Every jump,
Every leap of faith,
I’ll be right there.
See people don’t  understand the words that I’m bringing,
Got nothing to hide,
Nothing hidden.
Just talking about my boys and my life and the deep struggles within em'.
They’ve got brains,
 got eyes,
Ears and feelings too.
Just cos they are young,
Doesn’t mean they don’t know or realise what in our life is going on.
What in our life is going wrong.
7,
9 and 13 too,
Living this life no one would ever choose,
But do you know what,
They take it on the chin,
Like me,
They really do.
It’s that tough exterior shell I’ve passed on to them.
Protecting what’s essentially fragile inside.
As they’re really just kids you know.
Shouldn’t have already had so much heartache and eternal pain.
They’ve been through so much for such little minds.
For me,
They’re the treasure I was always hoping to find.
So we deal with this,
And we deal with that,
We deal with anything as we have that special,
Unspoken pact.
Like that of the hierarchy in a wolf pack.
My 3 little carers you know,
Since my health turned and I done in my back,
They’re there for me with everything,
As I am them,
I appreciate every little thing they do or memories we make on our lifes track.
Thank you boys for giving me my life back! 

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Comments

author
Violet Freese

I think this is so special.  Really I do.  As a mother and a grand mother, that made some doozie mistakes with my kids.. I can only say to whomever. Just remember you can never go back. So what you miss stays missed no matter how many I am sorrys you say.  The things we do or do not do in the past can never be undone it can only be dealt with.  To your sons are very fortunate to have you as their dad .....really.

Great job violet

Reply
author
james bevan

that actually got my tear ducts starting. what a lovely comment. I write from the heart but not had much of that at late so my writing flow has stopped. I want to get all my poetry into a book and get it published as something for my boys, family, friends and past and future partners

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