Lost

You asked me if I'm okay
I want to scream and shout no I'm destroying myself from the inside
no I'm hurting so much emotionally i feel it physically too
But all I can say is yes I'm alright 
I try so hard but I just can't get myself to say it 
I am so lost 
I want to not feel anything 
I want to be happy 
​been through too much pain and suffering 
Just make this pain I feel inside go 
Feeling like I am being ripped apart 
make this pain stop please 
just tired of all the lies I tell 
Tired of all the pain 
I'm sorry if i just  decide one day that death might be a  better option than hurting so much I tried

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