Poem -

Lost at War

This is my first ever poem so any replies / criticism is greatly appreciated. 

Straight out of training, into a different world,
Into the war zones they are hurled,
Shipped off to risk their lives as teenagers
Sent to go and get rid of the terrorist invaders,

Up before dawn, back after dusk,
Not once did they make a fuss,
Not knowing if it'll be their last day,
Don't worry about me mother, they always say,

Although they worry themselves all the time,
They tell their loved ones everything will be fine,
Don't worry mum, don't worry dad,
Please, just for me, don't be sad

Away from families for up to a year,
Not once ever showing their fear,
Having to be the brave ones out in a different land,
Fighting non stop in the scorching heat and sand

The tours nearly over, they forget about normality,
They're used to every day brutality,
They come home and it doesn't feel right,
They hear the smallest bang and are filled with freight

They can't speak to anyone, nobody would understand,
Nobody gets what happens out in that foreign land,
The things they saw at that age just wasn't fair,
They may be home now, but part of them is still there.

 

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Comments

author
pauline codd

I am only a novice Bucks, but for your first poem you have done brilliant.  I enjoyed reading it, well done.

Reply
author
Nine Eleven

I really enjoyed reading your poem, I can't even imagine what some soldiers go through in there minds after they come home, it must be very hard to adapt to a different life. Well done, welcome to cosmofunnel and if I may be so bold as to suggest that you read and check over for any spelling errors but who am I to talk, I'm no William Shakespeare myself, just a thought though. Look forward to reading more stories from your brain soon, take it easy.

Reply
author
Bucks370

Thank you, I am a soldier myself. I've noticed the spelling error now, thank you for pointing it out. I'll make sure I check it with somebody who can spell properly next time before I put it anywhere ?

Appreciate the reply. 

Reply
author
Barbara Niedan

What a true and great poem.I have a feeling your going do well
with your poetry.Salute to you dear soldier.Welcome. 
 

Reply

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