Love is present and in past.

I've  never been good at goodbyes but I feel it closing in, its like a ghost that reaches out his sentiment upon my skin
I hold that night accountable for my love and his dismay, and I have lived without his touch,  which seems forever and a day , twenty two years of longings in that desprate sun, and a million reasons not to breathe But to live there's more than one, I cannot imagine there's a time my heart it did not mourn,  for I was there in misery before the crack of dawn, I didn't see the light that day, I turned away and lay with dark, for when he left this life and me he took away the spark, and now I find that love again and pain it begs me not to go, but love is stronger than my greif although It came in slow,  I cannot begin to fathom the end of one love story  
To the next of heart, for how do I,  if I still believe that love shall never part, I am in love with heaven and earth for both these world's contain, more than I had  ever  thought I in love could  gain, the memories of love as he sleeps in dreams,  held in halos and of wings,  but to earth my lover and  my heart much love Above all he brings , and so I feel that moving on is sader than I've ever known, for he who sleeps to dream of sort the heavens can't compare nor loan, for love it is the very reason I was on my own, but now I have a hand to hold,  and a desire to make it last, but how do I move in time, when love is present and in past.