"nobody in particular"

Started smoking again.
Because the fumes remind me of  you,
  and that smell in my hair
      is the same one that tickles your breath,
          as we lie
               woven into bed sheets.

Started using again.
Because the taste of dust is the same as the taste of you.
The one that reminds me of the things that you do.
I bite my own lip  
   to feel less alone.

Started drinking again.
Because when my brain overheats,
    the burn in my throat replaces the one in my head,
And I can carry on.
Painting pictures, etching memories
      of the last time we shared a shower,
             and we both could breathe.