Not Romeo...

After a long tiring day, after to my deity I pray, she wanted something for me to say.
On the tip of my mouth were 3 brief words, but I decided to share with her my painful worlds.
I told her "Keep holding my hand hard and finish the labyrinth to my heart."
The pain in my head has been there for a century, but I ask you can you fix it for me?

Shall I tell you my love story? But do not expect a sorry!
Once there was a boy, and once there was a girl.
If they had met they wouldn't have lived in worry, but then it all went black and blurry,
And that was because they never met. I always let that story sink in my head.

But that wasn't quite it! the boy unwittingly met the girl, and entry to his heart she did quickly spur.

He was left with a broken heart, and with what he thought he forgot,
But no, he hadn't forgotten the pain. Longed by masses of fools was the pain, like being harshly hit by a train.

Is this depression lasting forever? He asked himself every morning.
Am I going to last forever? He wondered if every day's gonna be boring.

But I know it's not forever.

My death is becoming sooner.

A warm bed and a cold heart,
a silent night and a sad heart...

Today I slept with anger in my eyes, but it didn't matter if I was going to close them anyway...

Is it bad that I can't find one reason to stay alive? Or is it worse that no matter the reason, I have to not die?

Do not judge me, yes I have a good life and I thank God for it, but please understand me, for I do not know what to do with it!

Love to the world is the colour painting it, but had they not known I preferred black instead of it?

I was a lover of life, not until it stabbed me with a knife.

But what's colour to the blind?

These words were not forced, but through me, they crossed.

Even though colour to the blind is nothing, it remains a beautiful mystery longed to be something...

Music is my clutch to heaven, it's my only sanctuary when I feel like a heathen.
When I ask you for your opinion about it, know that the pathway to my heart, you've found it.

Choose all your words wisely for I read between the lines elaborately.

"Lose all hope" was written on the doors of hell.
The same was to be found in my heart's cell.

I have a lack of interest towards almost everything, so if you really care, do not forget your mind to bring...

O, cure to my affliction, ruler of my heart!
You are my addiction, my long-lost art.
You're the reason for me to wake up,
The reason into pieces I don't break up.

I call upon you to ease my pain,
Freeze the time, and repeat my name.

I am sorry for I don't know whether I'll go in the desert searching for you like Leyla, or if like Majnun I'll lose it all in one leila (night).

We are one, but we certainly haven't won.

They say the sea is full of fish, but I do not know if to search I wish.

To my philophobia, I am a prisoner,
And for your pleasure, I'm a worker.

I am a true lover, but I always slump at the thought of loving and being loved.
What must one do to deserve the love of another? And what must one do deserve to love another?

I am the true lover before you, but who deserves my damaged love? Not even few!

In this life, I am not Romeo,
Neither are you Juliette.
But I do not know about our pasts.
Through a love story, we may have passed.

I know this makes everything but sense, but I beseech you to reach me!
My mind is constantly conflicted, so I beg you not to complicate it.

I have always been scared of telling you my feelings,
but if you already know it, more time we shan't be wasting.

Farewell and good night, to the beauty for whom every day I fight...

Yours and only,
Troubled Ahmed.