Poem -
On Yonder High Branch
Who now
Can be my loved tribe
All my corners are
Empty and bare
I am envy at crow
Set on yonder high branch
Where a dusked orange glow
Shines them black
Yet the winter yields
nothing but
Bare earth and snow
And a cawing at dead air
As pretty they go
In a wintertime
Murdered, black wings
stealing night
But together,
So pretty a tribe
Taking flight
And I'm envy at crow
At the jet stain they leave
As they rip up the sky, as a
murder they weave
In a tribe,
Mingled feathers through soft
orange glow
And pretty, so pretty a sight
As they go
M P 16/12/21
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Comments
another classic great write Marion! there are so many people that need love! I wouldn't know where to start!...................................................................Jim
They say to start with oneself don't they?...and isn't that the most impossible first step Jim?
hugs x
depends on who you listen to I think Marion
You are a wise man Jim x
just an old barn owl that can do nothing save he sees the Son.
It's wonderful to have a faith, I envy you that ⚘⚘
all it takes is a sincere desire to know, with sincere prayer, willing to act upon the answer when it comes.I envy your ability to express yourself. that is a gift!
Ah Jim..I used to have faith...I still search for it but sometimes life events smash the heavens as well as the world...I'm still rummaging through the rubble...but you are kind and I appreciate it ..hugs x
maybe what you seek is spiritual and not in worldly philosophies of men.
I have never listened to men Jim and certainly not their worldly philosophies. No... now I struggle with the spiritual...questioning how 'full of goodness' this system of life and death is...as I said, heaven fell down when my world exploded...hugs x
I don't know how to start with my comments on this amazing poem. I am pretty choked. This poem is profoundly beautiful, no, wait I mean it is beautifully profound. This is as close to perfect as any poem can be, in my opinion. It runs on as smooth as silk throwing image after image into the readers mind. There is black and there is orange — that is the world beyond this one — in your poem the orange and black are the crows and setting sun. Oh what images those crows treat us to. Hmmmm...word choices are brilliant sharp and sassy. There is just the right amount of rhyme. Every tool the poet has at their disposal has been used to great effect here. I absolutely adore this poem. I really do. Marion, this is brilliant. This is a masterpiece. This is genius! Xx
You know ...I am so pleased you like this one because I value your opinion and while I normally have no opinion on what I write...it's just feelings, I like this one too. Can I say that? Tough, I just did lol. A couple of times in my life( when things were off kilter) I have found myself staring through the windows of other people's lives and envying something I could never put my finger on. Bizarrely, I have found myself doing this the last 6 months or so, in.particular envying big families. Wishing I'd had more kids ...as if by having a few more kids I wouldn't miss Judd lol...the mind is a crazy place Tina...mine is at least. Well...that was what I meant here...I miss my tribe, Judd, Keller, Molly...irreplaceable. I envy the crows...their togetherness. Hugs lovely friend ❤
You are allowed to like your poems! The ones you really like yourself are "the ones" The ones that need to take flight to the world because the world will love them too. I absolutely adore this poem. This poem has become one of my favourites out of all the poems I read anywhere. If there was a book of all the greatest poems ever written this poem of yours would not be out of place slipped among the pages. This truly is a great poem and deserves to be known world wide. I really mean that. This poem is truly great. You have penned a masterpiece...you genius you! I think what does it is the overall darkness of the tone ....Black and orange, loneliness theme. Words like ... murder ... shines them black ... wintertime ... bare earth and snow ... caring at dead air... those words juxtaposed with words of comfort and beauty ... soft feathers ... soft orange glow ...together ...pretty. And then you have the repetitive ...pretty as they go ... tying it together. Then there is the absolutely bang on perfect rhythm and the brilliant use of rhyme that is equisite because it is not 'in your face' rhyming. What you have here is a neat little package of a delightful, even though sombre, little surprise. Not all poems are tied together with a glorious poetic thread, but the best ones are. Some poems are tied too tightly and that is worse than not being tied at all. Some poems end up being nothing more than lists of nice sounding words, not that any of your work is like that ( all your work I love because I can see the greatness running through) no, I am mentioning those sorts to hilight just how brilliant your poem here is. And it is brilliant. Totally and utterly brilliant. Oh I love poems, good ones, I read poetry because my soul hungers for poems but it is only satisfied by the good poems, they feed my soul. You have most definitely written soul fodder here and thank you for that xx
P.s And it is the "O" running through it that clinches it for me because Oh what a fucking awesome poem x
Lol...thankyou for this awesome and uplifting comment ...you are truly biased and I LOVE it 😁😆
Seriously, it is like a much needed gift wrapped in a bow and in return I am sending you my sincere wishes that your Christmas is as amazing as you are and that it truly is your best ever love 💝💝💝
Nothing to do with bias, you are a poetic genius! Xx
Not ...but you can have a heart anyway...three in fact 🤩💖💖💖
wow what great poem
your masterpice!!!!!!!
Thankyou Greg...you have an amazing Christmas ok...many hugs xx
Love and hugs to you as well Marion
Merry Christmas🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄☃️☃️
💝💝💝