One more day.

Hi Sorrow (Beth?)..........I really like this piece...........it created a picture of a stoic face in my minds eye.........a face in pain............awesome word choices here.........one thing (and this is just a suggestion)........I think this would be more powerful and impactful if you changed the formatting a bit.........regardless.........I've put it in my favorites...........great debut write here.........well done ........and.......Welcome to COSMO!!............smiles.............T xo

yeah I think Tony nailed it Beth, it is a very good verse capturing real feelings, and formatting is essential in short verses to optimise the impact....sometimes a trivial thing like that can spark something with the reader; and there is a relationship with the reader and poet that must be respected when posting, personally I love your verse, formatting is a very basic thing; just follow the 'breaks's' as you read it out loud....cheers Beth, I'll look out for your stuff, and I'm now following you, very good....

Across it slides,

down the way.

Happy trail makes it fade.

Trickle.

. it slides down her leg

as she bites her lip for pain.

Ecstasy for a moment,

as it trickles a little more.

Tears stream down;  

smiling lips

to numb it for another day.