paying it forward..a story poem

Paying it forward 
A story poem 
By 
Jude Kyrie 

The iron gates to the graveyard 
creaked liked bones. 
It was my kryptonite death and darkness 
I know you live here now. 
Your mother told me a few hours ago. 
I search for your grave in the moonlight. 
I see a candle burning on a headstone. 
I know it is you 
your mother visited this afternoon. 
I sit down on the mowed lawn of the cematary. 
Fear has left now i have found you. 
I throw on a playlist from the long ago past. 
And settle down for one of our chats. 
I know it will be me doing all the talking 
Buts that ok it was always like that . 
Do you remember when we were kids? 
I was sat on the dock by the lake 
The sky was blue 
The lake was blue 
Your eyes were blue 
And I was black and blue 
Stepfathers are not always kind. 
You slipped next to  me 
Placing your arm over my 
beaten young shoulders. 
Your hair smelt like sunlight. 
Just the small touch of kindness 
Made my eyes tear up. 
I wanted to shout my love for you. 
Across the water of the big lake. 
But only silence would come out. 
The one who stole my  childhood 
With his cruelty and anger. 
Had beaten my inner 
confidence away as well. 
Do you know I wrote love poems 
for you 
but i never sent them. 
But they were beautiful 
Just like you were. 
When you moved away I was desolate. 
I tried to find you years later 
To say I am cured I am me again.
My pain is healed 
I love you. 
But you were married. 
I heard you have a daughter. 
She is with your mother 
Who cannot keep her
As she is very sick herself.
Since you and your husband 
Had the car accident 
I just want you to know 
I will look after your daughter 
Like you took care of me. 
And she will be safe 
And provided for. 
I wish you could let me know 
You understand. 
That you wanted this. 
Just then as if by magic 
A cloud passed the moon 
And its light lit up the headstone. 
As if in answer to me 
A beautiful monarch butterfly
Landed on my hand
Staying motionless for a full minute.
I knew she was there.
I touched the cold granite stone 
And said  l always loved you honey. 
And I always will. 
I walked to the light of the street.
And felt it was far enough away. 
So she could not hear me. 
Sitting on a park bench.
I put my head in my hands 
And I wept like a child. 

18 months later

Belinda just turned thirteen
She is a beautiful child.
Looking just like her mother.
we never had children
At first we were afraid.
But after a week or two
We were in love with her
My wife and Belinda 
Are like sisters and confidents.
They shop have lunch 
And chat like best friends.
I do everything I can for her
She is the light of my life.
The adoption papers 
were signed a month ago.
She makes me full of joy
and tears with a single action.
When the papers were signed
She threw her arms around my neck
and hugged me
Then she brought tears
to my eyes.
When she said
I love you dad.