Picnic on the Moon

(I love Bel Canto so much. Even my daughter loves this song.)

we’d lie on the grass together 
bellies full of hot dogs 
licking Dorito crumbs off our fingers 

I could feel your body twitching 
aching to fly upwards 
to the stars 

I kept a gentle hand on your arm 
afraid God would change his mind 
decide to take you 
instead of permitting you to define me 

for when a woman becomes a mother 
that is all she will ever be 

but unlike you 
your tender face always upturned 
awed by the infinite 
I was afraid of that vastness 

it reminded me 
of a painting of an ocean 
I’d seen in church as a child 
impossible gray-black depths 
an abyss of vengeful leviathans 
thrashing and tearing 
my sinful sinew and bone 

so I held onto you 
even when you towered above me 
could break me in two 
you suffered in silence 
my hand at your arm 

but the day finally came 
when you stood up 
gently forced yourself from my grip 

rose to the sky 
your arms outstretched 
in the most beautiful offering 

because God changed his mind 
suddenly you fell 
like a feather in the wind 

nothing could have 
been done, they said 
you knew it was the last chance 
to free yourself 
from the strange, arbitrary bonds 
of this strange, arbitrary existence 

where we are born 
taunted by dreams of flight 
yet rooted to the ground 
by piteous feet 

now as I look upwards 
lying on the ground 
belly full of hot dogs 
licking Dorito crumbs off my fingers 
head resting on smooth stone 

I watch you fly 
as you’d always wanted to