Poem -
Scream
here I lay dark and envy I see the pounding. I hear your breath as it takes me away, my fears run I am Downing but can you see. Nobody got a story. Only inside can I hear my heart and my lungs screaming with fear.
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Comments
Strangely elusive to the point of incoherence. You provide us with the briefest of inchoate sketches.
The sense of fear is only compounded by the chilling line, "Nobody got a story"; and your chosen username just seems to emphasise that: as though you yourself are just an ancillary character in someone else's tale.
Fascinating!
Welcome to Cosmofunnel.
J.
thank you so much I've actually use to do better. I've actually won the young authors awards 4 times once when I was 8,10,11,13 but I am trying to get back into writing.
Oh...you don't need to convince me! And of course the trick to getting back into writing is...just WRITE!! That's all you have to do.
Cosmofunnel is a good place to do that too. I look forward to reading much more (but no pressure or anything!!).
Again...welcome. And a very Merry Christmas. May the frost be cold, but not biting. May the fires be warm, but not burning. Open all your gifts, but one; so that you always have something to look forward to.
J x