Smoke.

Small toes, six years old,
stretch upon a chair.
She reaches high and catches
the rusted cupboard by a hair.

The inside of this appear to be empty,
but in the far back corner she finds
the small tin box of saltine crackers
that she was able to hide.

It's not quite full, but not quite bare,
and so she pries the lid,
to take one cracker, ever so gently,
that she had before hid.

Breakfast she's had, but her stomach still growls,
and wishes it had more.
She gathers the strength to lift herself up,
off of the cold tile floor.

She re-hides the tin in a different place,
to ensure that they are not found.
This time she slides them under a loose floorboard,
and closes it without a sound.

She pretends her stomach's groans
are just the growls of her teddy bear, Jane.
Nothing throughout these long rough years
could make her forget her mother's name.

She tip-toes to her father's room,
where her mother used to lay.
He now lies sleeping upon the bed,
the sheets and covers frayed.

It used to be that when she came
a'wandering to this room,
she could still smell the sweet aroma
of her mother's perfume.

The only scent she can trace now,
is her father's cigarette smoke.
Between that and the mass of empty beer bottles,
it makes her want to choke.

She covers her face with her only friend, Jane,
and inhales soft and slow.
Because embracing this dear old bear
is the most love she's ever shown.

He awakens now, and begins to grumble,
rubbing his eyes and head.
He starts to stand up, but his vision is blurred,
and he plops back down on the bed.

He notices his daughter,
standing quietly at his feet.
He clears his throat and yells at her,
"Go'an' fetch me somethin' to eat"

"Daddy, there ain't nothin' left"
She says as she looks down.
He shakes his head and chuckles,
then his smile turns to a frown.

"Then go fetch me my pack,
and come right back, ya hear?"
She nods her head and scurries off,
her mind spinning with fear.

She brings it back and he pops out a smoke,
lighting it right away.
For awhile he just sits there,
she thinks he could stay all day.

She watches the smoke rise higher and higher,
it makes her wish she was the sky.
Like the clouds that float by overhead,
without ever having to try.

He pulls out his wallet,
and to her it looks thin.
She peeks in and takes a look inside-
there's two singles and a ten.

He closes it quick and put on a smile,
stands and slips on his shoes.
"We're in luck" he tells his child,
as if she doesn't have a clue.

“We’ve just enough for groceries this week,
I’ll go on to the store.”
She just nods as he tells her,
“you just worry about your chores.”

She knows where he’s really going,
he’s off to town to find
a pub, or bar, or brewery-
he won’t be back ‘til nigh.

He puts on his coat and hat,
the sleeves of which are frayed.
Before he leaves on out the door,
he tosses his butt in the ashtray.

This one falls short of its target,
and lands burning on the floor.
She’s about to pick it up,
but he calls her to the door.

“Lock on up behind me” he says,
the walls echoing what he spoke.
She agrees obediently,
although she knows the lock is broke.

Once he’s gone, she fetches Jane,
and takes her to her bedroom to play.
They have a tea party with some cracked cups,
and some biscuits made of clay.

It’s only been a half an hour,
when she smells the familiar smoke.
This time the scent is much stronger,
and she begins to sputter and choke.

She turns around, expecting to see
her father at the door.
But the door’s still closed, and she notices
smoke crawling up through the floor.

Curious, she puts down Jane,
gets up and turns the knob.
Immediately, she jerks it back,
and her hand begins to throb.

She now can see the fire,
as it pushes into the room.
She turns and jumps out her window,
to escape the fiery doom.

In the middle of nowhere, she stands and watches
her home burn to the ground.
There’re no neighbors to see, or places to go,
so no one hears a sound.

She stays like this for quite some time,
and eventually her father comes home.
As she expected, he’s brought nothing to eat,
but at least now she’s not alone.

He stares at the mess without saying a word
and eventually begins to look
for remains of his house that he can find,
and uncover from the soot.

He finds nothing but a half a pot,
and a piece of an old rocking chair.
Just before he gives up his search,
he finds the bow of an old teddy bear…

He tosses it aside without thinking twice,
not recognizing the special mote.
He ignores his daughter’s hopeless sobs,
and reaches into his coat.

She thinks he’s looking for something to eat,
but from deep within his cloak,
he pulls out a pack of cigarettes,
and sits down to take a smoke.