Something

There's always something there,
In the back of your mind,
Battling it out with the other little things stored in your box,
Hidden away from reality,
Confusion laced thoughts,
Memories too distant to even recall,
There's the times you wish he could just grow up,
You can handle it too,
Anger and jealousy ripple through your body,
Blood comes first,
Nothing else,
Not them,
Us.

Fire flowing through your veins,
Imagination creeping into every nook and cranny of the things you'd rather ignore,
What if?
Why?
All the questions bundled up and thrown down a well,
Don't wanna see them,
Don't wanna hear them,
Sweet moments linger on the brink of your memory,
Nose twitching with an indescribable annoyance,
Where was he when you needed him?
What happened to blood runs thicker than anything else?
All the little things made it major,
Curled up at night wishing for hugs,
Nobody's there,
Flopped on the couch with failed assessments,
Nobody cares,
Spinning in excitement,
Nobody was there, 
Not that you cared.

Walls of steel fortify your mind,
Don't let them in,
What is there to see?
Nothing anymore,
Maybe once,
Not after your angel kicked the can,
Remember who stopped you from saying goodbye,
Grow up,
Anger and tears threaten to spill,
Who's there to comfort you?
That's right,
Nobody.

That little something still persists,
It won't go away,
Not from lack of trying,
But from those little memories,
Brining smiles to your face,
Warm hugs, the effect doesn't fade,
Bright peals of laughter, the sound doesn't die,
Something is there,
Whether it matters or not is a whole new rant,
But theres always that little something,
Loyalty to blood, then friends, then work, last of all world,
Something is there,
Whether you like it or not is another long winded rant,
But that little something,
Whether it be blood or memories,
Clings onto you,
Reminds you of what you never had.