Stan’s sordid affair

He lies beside Shiela calling Shirley in his sleep
Luckily Shiela hasn’t heard him coz her dream is very deep
One of these nights the cat will be out of the bag
Then his dearest darling better half will know about his slag
He is having hanky panky with Shirley Smart down the street
infact on his wife’s night shift twice a week the pair of them meet
So as soon as Shiela grabs her handbag and slams the back door
Stan Smart sneaks out behind her for a quickie with his amore

Stan let his sordid secret slip out to his pal the other night 
They were both abit worse for wear after a pub crawling plight
Tho his chum is a good mate he has known him since school days
Stan regrets his big gob bragging about his foolish ways
Well it’s only a matter of time till Shiela finds out about his affair
Everybody knows everybodies business living there
Yet there is no love lost between him and his spouse
She’s the one that pays the bills and the rent for the house

If Stan had anything about him he would tell Shiela about his wicked ways
Mind you she could never know the truth or the money he pays
But deep down Stan’s scared of his wife so God help him when she knows the score
There will be no stopping her when she throws him out that door
It’s not like he has anywhere else to go
Shirley wouldn’t want him it’s just the way she has to make a living you know