Suicide note...

With my skin open wide
How could I commit suicide? 
As my tears fall, you will smile
How could you ignore my cries? 
While I bleed, this is the reason why...
As my angel tries to walk me two steps forward 
The demons drag me three steps backwards
I have a selfish romance with a razor blade 
I'm sick of choosing between love and hate
Overthinking gets me down 
Voices are a numbing sound
A vision of me buried underground 
No going to heaven, no devil's allowed 
As I drain of what looks like a merlot red 
Is this a cry or do I really want to be dead? 
As my hand turns to solid stone 
I'm hovering above like a forgiving soul
Hello society, do you care if I live?
I'm hollow because I always give 
I'm starting to see a light with my mother standing there 
Shall I succumb to the end and walk up them stairs?
I'm sorry mam, not this time, I have to live a worthy life 
I might be in times of struggle but I'm not giving up my fight 
I'm still a man
I'm still a person 
I'm still a dad 
Fire still burning 
Round and round I could go
But somehow I'll find home 
Writing these words keeps me going
You reading them,
Thanks.
I'm no longer alone
This is my self help
No longer a suicide note
No longer...