The Final Time

Reality only hits you once and it’s when you close your eyes for the final time.
I can understand that, but I cannot perceive it, dream it, feel it nor conceive it.
My senses tell me otherwise for when the wind blows there will always be another time… When that clock strikes there will not be another time.
This feeling is cold but death does not compromise and one day I know there will not be another time.
I’ve thought, I’ve searched, I’ve battled and I’ve screamed for someone to tell me these wonderful things, but God does not sing and I cannot breathe, please send me an angel; give me a halo and wings.
I’m being tortured and I don’t know what I’ve done; to fall on this life ran by needles and guns… To only be destined to run towards nothing.
What have I done?
I understand that this is the injustice of life, the plight of the man; who refused to give in to the time of the sands.
It runs in succession like blood from a wound, leaking refined rocks to your impending doom.
Now you can call me a liar but don’t call me a thief, for we are all in ourselves dispensable freaks… But I’m different am I not?
Lord I hope I’m different for that is the only validation that was bestowed upon me.
You left us with differences in a world that is angry and all of our smiles are code for please save me, because nobody listens and nobody cares, how can we love when loving is rare?
I’ve been beaten, broken, stabbed and abused and how can you say that it isn’t true, for I know it’s also happened to you.
My context is mine and your context is yours, if you do feel pain believe it or not, I want to know what for.
I’ll relate if I can, I’ll debate if I can, if that happens to make you feel better.
I will grow if I can, I will learn if I can, if that’s what calms down the weather.
I will shout at the sky with tears in my eyes if you told me that it’s what you wanted; because I cannot rise if you do not rise and I can feel you dragging me under.
Hope won’t save us now from a world that is hopeless; no leap of faith can bring me tranquility when the notion is senseless.
Don’t label my mind… Don’t judge because you don’t understand.
I would never make you feel predictable for I know life is not.