The War Inside

The tiny face. 
A blue-eyed boy. 
Broken spectacles. 
Ragged yellow toy. 
Thrust into darkness. 
Vulnerable and weak. 
You clung to your Mother. 
No words left to speak. 
Thousands of faces. 
Naked and bare. 
Promised a shower. 
No water runs there. 
I clicked my heels. 
Saluted the sky. 
Now I pray forgiveness. 
This, my time of goodbye. 
Ashamed of the emblem. 
Twisted crosses I wore. 
Propaganda and promise. 
A dictators' whore. 
So, I reach in my pocket. 
And remember the boy. 
The tiny spectacles. 
The ragged yellow toy. 
I leave them at the gate. 
Although in heaven you can see. 
I retreat into darkness. 
Where hell awaits me.