TWELVE SINS (Floating Away)

I am standing on the other side

and looking at the river

twist and turn on the rocks.

Nature

is blessed for its effervescence

and our connections

are so remote to please her.

I have cried my last tears

for the things

that I am holding in my center

and I

will release them to this river.

To be in Gods Light

I must be free

of tribulations and bondage

and earn these lessons

for the supremeity of God

is above mankind.

I let these things go on leaves

each leaf

representing past torments and suffrages.

I found

a special tree where I found God

and the bundle of leaves

was neatly laid

on the ground for my taking.

Gentle and fragile

I picked up a leaf and placed it in my hand.

With each subsequent leaf

I will lay

my tribulations and pains upon them.

They all shall float

to a place

where God has made their destiny

and fade into the abyss.

On the first leaf

I placed 

the many children that grew up without me

and an oldest daughter and son

who could not

forgive me for my abandonment.

I prayed for forgiveness

then released the leaf into the running stream.

On the second leaf

I placed

the restless life I lived without a home

always living through others.

I prayed for forgiveness

then released

the leaf into the running stream.

On the third leaf

I placed

my inherent need to survive using cunning

and conning my way around the World.

I prayed for forgiveness

then released

the leaf into the running stream.

On the fourth leaf

I placed

my Sisters irreversible damage to her Soul

and she knows what I had done.

I prayed for forgiveness

then released

the leaf into the running stream.

On the Fifth leaf

I placed

the disjointed relationship with my mother

and let go

of the suffrages of not receiving her love.

I prayed for forgiveness

then released

the leaf into the running stream.

On the sixth leaf

I asked those

to forgive me for being a thief in the night

and deceiving them in the daylight.

I prayed for forgiveness

then released

the leaf into the running stream.

On the seventh leaf

I placed

the hollowness of love, knowing

that love

was so much more than what I thought.

I prayed for forgiveness

then released

the leaf into the running stream.

On the eighth leaf

I placed

the doubt of not being good enough

trying to prove myself

and my worth to others in the World.

I prayed for forgiveness

then released

the leaf into the running stream.

On the ninth leaf

I placed

the elements of my creation ability

when it was

all about me and not God and His mercy.

I prayed for forgiveness

then released

the leaf into the running stream.

On the tenth leaf

I placed

a letter for my ‘one’ daughter who tried

but turn away from me in the end.

I prayed for forgiveness

then released

the leaf into the running stream.

On the eleventh leaf

I placed

all the colors of my artistic palette

for I never thanked God

for the miraculous gifts bestowed.

I prayed for forgiveness

then released

the leaf into the running stream.

On the twelve leaf

I placed

the love of my life to get a message to God

and that she

will conjoin me with his mercy.

I prayed for forgiveness

then released

the leaf into the running stream.

Now- I stand over the river

watching the leaves

float away

with the tribulations of my life

into the Mecca

of Gods awaiting arms.

Somehow his breath stirs my hair

knowing

that he has already forgiven me.

The majestic wind, and

the divinity of God settles my heart.

Twelve Sins- floating away.

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