When no one ever understands you..

You start to become emotional, panicked, anxious, worry and traumatize yourself that it’s your fault and there is something wrong with you. 
That you become isolated from everyone around you and disassociate yourself from the environment in which you once always loved. But still no one understands you. They tell you “ tell me what’s wrong, talk about it” or I’m hear to listen “ but as much as they listen and tell you how to deal with it or to forget about it or say it will go away or that your just going through something. Doesn’t help anyone, it makes us feel more vulnerable . Knowing that this will constantly happen even if you feel things are getting better, at one point it is bound to happen again. And then what? When no one understands you what is here left to do? The thoughts that roam your mind, the rush of anger you get when seizing an emotional moment or the lingering ideas of just getting over with it cause you know that no matter how many times. Your gonna end up back in the same place and be noted as the one person who they would have never suspected this would happen to. And that emotional rollercoaster goes from thought and anger into reality. The final moment of decision that lingers your mind is in effect and the final step you wanna take is hurting yourself .. and you always keep giving yourself reasons why not to do it and people love you but where are they? Why are they not helping me. They think they are but actual make it worse. It’s the end game and the last move is taken by your love ones so it soon comes to an end but somehow when your gone it will start again because that’s just how life is. The cycle of over recurring mixed with insuring  that what you have created never dies along with you. Instead is kept as a memory that moves along when you weren’t able to.