work

Were all on good behaviour at work but when we get home we look in our mirrors and twerk

We say that song is stupid (I woke up like this) but we sing it all day.

We advise others in the most polite ways when we really want to give a blank stare and calmly walk away.

We go to parties and say it was a blast but, really we were drunk and only stayed until the alcohol could last. We wake up Monday morning and want to call in sick but…

Because you were wasted with your boss last night your excuse stinks so we make our coffee with cream and complain about our weight, consequently we stagger in work late and your smug boss appears like high gloss and says some stupid tag line like “wake up every morning no yawning now get your skates on” and you give a plastic smile, and decide not to tell him about how out of it he was and that you recorded him worshiping the moon. You quickly come to your senses and remember your mortgage, car and tax and work like a dog at that is that.