You look at me how?

You look at me how?
Beep Beep Beep, Hum Hum Hum, I've been searching, I've been here before, I know that I can't hide, singing my words through out the day dancing my shame away, Hum Hum Hum, and she cries herself to sleep, going into deep not knowing if she'll keep, dreaming, laying, with clear minds. Beep Beep Beep, Hum Hum Hum, days and days go by, all day with sleepless nights. Hum Hum Hum "lights out" she stares at you, water breaks the dam, thinking life, shadows and calls from the man. She consumes you 10 by 10 at first, after 20 she regrets and knows its to late. No stopping now she'll take you in her hollow, pause, think, swallow, 10 by 10 cries of fear, whispers to myself "why are you doing this?" Sadness: can't turn back now, conscience screams NO STOP! body tired, begs you please please continue. Eyes shutter I lay I contemplate, I've locked myself in this room, got as comfortable as possible took beep without hum and fell asleep. I took palm fulls at a time, sadness took over, anger controlled her, I hurt the fear that's so vulnerable it hides behind faded white lines, he's yelling out "CAN'T I JUST LIVE, the rest of my life an interpreted dance? I count, no wait cross that out. I couldn't write, but why did I? Because of the girl in the front of my class. START OVER! the life of a tear builds up after so many years, and this plain is so pain, so homeless and vain, so I ask you brain will you spare this life of mine some change? I'm tired of this same. I don't want to be alone. I never wanted this, and again why did you do it? Over&over&over, over there, there's a bridge you can only get across it if you, HUSH! don't speak the wall is so high it might fall. "STOP!" My head it hurts, what are you feeling? What do you think I'm telling you, I want this gone. &you look at me how?