Poem -
Your Game
When you don't get what you want
you pitch a fit.
When I don't you never hear
me complain a bit.
It's not a game for two.
It's a game for you.
Where you matter most,
and I matter least.
But you make it seem like
I am the beast.
I won't take it anymore.
You've hurt me to the core.
It's now time
for this game to end,
if you want me to stay
your friend.
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Comments
This is so stridently assured; a young woman finally pushing back in a cruelly unbalanced relationship. But then she weakens at the end...brilliantly conveyed by the shorter last line in the final stanza, by the way!
Heartening and maddening at the same time!!
Wonderfully clear and passionate voice.
J ;)
She's not really weakening at the end I don't think. Maybe in a way she is. She's more so giving an ultimatum. She wants to stay friends but if he/she isn't willing to level the playing field and make it fair she's giving up.
I'm so glad you enjoyed it and love it when I get feedback like this! Thank you :)
xxxLily
Perhaps 'weakens' is too strong a word to use; but her ultimatum is qualified (shall we say) by the prospect that they remain friends. I mean, what makes her think that a friendship with this guy is going to be any more balanced than a full romantic relationship?!
I love the poem, though...and your strong poetic voice. Keep up the great work!
J ;)
That is true, I think in a friendship...it's easier to establish boundaries and speak up because you aren't as worried about causing rifts. I can't think of the exact words I want to use. It's easier to balance because she may feel like he doesn't have that control over her anymore. More freedom maybe?
I'm glad you love it, I plan on writing two more parts. Thank you! I really appreciate it, love your feedback, nice and engaging. Makes me think :)
xxxLily
Hi Lilly In life we have to make a stand at times,
to not be played as a fool or controlled
A relatable piece
Good on you to say no more
Good advice Enjoyed !
Best wishes Debs x
Yes we do and sometimes it can be really hard to speak up and say something needs to change. I'm glad you enjoyed it and see it as good advice. Thank you :)
xxxLily
sounds like all my past relationships... are they all suppose to end like this. I've learned that good intentions keep the bond close and trust holds it together.
I believe trust is the foundation of every healthy and lasting relationship. Once trust is broken a relationship is never the same. Good intentions do keep a bond close and so does selflessness. Thinking about the other if it will effect them as well and doing what is best for both sides. Every relationship is different and sometimes there are unhealthy ones that need to be worked on and either fixed or cut off.
xxxLily