I REMEMBER NOW

My Story of How I met Jesus in Spirit...

When I was old enough to walk and asked questions about the Photos on the Wall in Beautiful Picture Frames...

People I have not met...

Someone knew who they were or they came out of some Magazine and thumb tacks kept them pinned to the wall or interior closet door or somewhere we weren't allowed to open...

We just always saw our Dad going there with what he would call Car Magazines...

I guess he didn't want us to be disappointed to see something we would never have...

Until, I got alone in the house...

No lock on the Door...

I did what anyone would do...

Yup, I peeked...

Where are the Cars?

Bras?

For Mom?

Sexy things...

For Mom?

No questions can be asked...

It might be a surprise...

Then what would anyone do?

Yup go to her panty and bra drawer...

Nothing even close...

Oh no...

Did I put everything back right?

Yes, I was careful and didn't move a lot of things...

Good timing...

10 minutes later they came home...

That was close...

I could tell time in tens...

​​​​​​"What are you doing?" My Mom asked.

​​​​​Dressing my Doll...

"Mom?" 

"Who are these people on our Wall?"

"That's your Uncle" Mom and Dad said in Stereo.

"He and his wife and children live far away we'll probably never see them" Dad said...

"Who's that?" I asked.

"That's your Dad's friend that passed away" she said.

"Passed a way what?" I asked.

"What does that mean?"

"He died" she said.

"Died" 

​​​​​​"Too much Purple?" I asked.

​​​​​"I got this one" my brother said.

​​​​​​"Look at me" He said.

He grabbed his throat with both hands, closed his eyes, fell on his back on the floor, held his breath.

Then he got up.

"The only difference is I'm alive" my brother said.

"Alive?"

Enough of the questions.

I needed a break.

I thought to myself.

I will ask what alive is tomorrow.

​​​​​​Back to the Wall.

"Who's that"? I asked.

​​​​​​"Jesus" My Mom said.

"Another one of Dad's friends?" I asked.

My oldest Brother spewed milk right out of his mouth and he started to choke.

A Comedy I thought to myself.

It turned into a Drama I thought to myself...

He lives he's okay...

I got that part...

I hope that doesn't make him more annoying...

I thought to myself...

This must be very important for me to understand...

"Who is he"? I asked.

"He's your Father" my Mom said.

"I thought Dad was my Father" I said.

"He's all or most of our Father's"?

​​​​​​"Where is he?" I asked.

Too deep for me for sure...

"He's in Heaven" my Mother said.

"Ooph" my Dad grunted.

"Can we go there"? I asked.

" You can talk to him through the Priest at Church " Mother said.

That sounds strange...

A middleman?

I didn't talk to him until I was 6 years old...

I had to if I was going to make my First Communion...

"And you'd better" Mom said.

​​​​​​I got a Messenger...

I thought to myself...

Found out he could give bad news too...

"You're not forgiven God said" the Priest said.

I knew from Sunday School he was our Mother's Father's, Father's, Father's, Father's, Father from how I understand it...

​​​​​​Talking to the Nun was like talking to the Priest in a Dress I thought to myself...

I didn't ask a lot of questions in class.

She could kick me out at 6 years old and now my Mother's going to have fun on me I thought to myself...

My parents hadn't hit me before but, I had been hit by others...

Did my parents pay them?

I wondered...

I didn't ask...

Time was going on...

Just doing what time did...

One day a thought came to me and I opened my Bible and it got turned into a Game...

The more I played it the more fun it became...

I thought to myself so I thought it was to myself...

I know I didn't say it outloud...

I was alone playing the My Bible Book Game alone in my room...

I didn't realize I was playing a game until the thought of my Dad's Magic 8 Ball came to my mind...

The more I played it I thought it was fun...

I didn't like the horror or tragedy parts of the game...

​​​​​​The happier parts would keep me playing...

Once his sad and his attackers would appear...

I'd feel bad all over again...

I was feeling like he was my oldest brother for years by then who passed away before I was born...

That dawned on me once my oldest Brother died and I knew exactly what that meant...

Then my family just started dying...

There's 2 of us left, relatives I still don't know, and our children...

Like Abel and Cain...
​​​​
A blessing and a curse...

Not together in case anyone's mind went to that side...

We tried real hard though to teach the children...

The World is big and stronger when they choose to be weaker...

​​​​​​Back to the Book...

​​Stories all talking about him like he's a Star in the entire Book and he was really real...

People sat and ate with him...

Then yes his friends, enemies, loved ones,  killed him and watch him die...

He was put in a Rock with a big boulder door...

For 3 days he was there...

Turned invisible...

​​​​​He disappeared...

I have a Magician for a Brother...

My Brother...

I became intrigued...

Wouldn't you have?

He would appear and heal and help people...

He was a friend...

He's my Father...

My Brother...

A Carpenter...

A Conversationalist...

​​​​​​That's his...

I'm too shy...

Works out great...

But, wait a second...

I did a little bad and couldn't be forgiven...

He forgave them who did more bad I thought...

They're forgiven?

I couldn't stop there...

I didn't...

I started upping my bad...

I was gently and lovingly stopped...

Jesus knows how to set things up ...

I've made mistakes since then...

I can still play The Bible Book Game...

It took a few years for me to make the next first move...

It's better now...

sparrowsong

​​​​​