Ok Rule - Intro 1st draft

Wrong side of 31yr , 5’3”  between 8st - 9st  both girls with blue eyes, shoulder length blonde hair  struggling with the downs, apparently some ups, of life,  but most importantly together as best friends finding there own unique,  independent feet in this crazy world.

Nothing to report about our families, as we are both very loved and close to both siblings and parents,  but why should that mean we are normal?  
If this is what single girls our age go through in the average northern life,  then it's about time someone wrote a self help book.  We are still figuring out the best form of help ourselves having been to trained councillors , personal trainers and  dieticians.  Not to mention the judgemental Doctors receptionist for the long awaited appointments for medication and of course,  the alternative therapy through local entrepreneurs,   the sporadic  use of recreational drugs.   In turn we hope this book can suffice,  as if anything else,  it should prove your not alone plus "maybe it could be worse".

 In the area we were born all the children of nearby villages attended the same comprehensive school, thus cementing an acquaintance for life of all local people 5yrs younger up to  5years older then their own age.  However, when drowned in alcohol or when speaking about home to strangers you only then seem to acknowledge .. "I know him we went to school together”.   If you are just generally strolling about or shopping in town , you tend not to ever acknowledge anyone whose face is familiar from school.     Myself and Amber do this,  mostly through fear of the usual greeting.    " alreet luv, it's been years are you married? how many kids have you now got?". It seems the inevitable question most asked by any local from school you've bumped into or to family members when attending parties - solo. 

 The overall childhood memories from our past seems to stem from the most favourite statement in a teenagers life "going out?". 
Whether meeting up with friends or discovering new friends from nearby villages,  long before Xbox, texting and Facebook ever materialised.   Brick walls, pay phones and youthies were the unmissable place to be from 6pm until late any night of the week.   Any teenager armed with a school lunch pass , your dads lighter, 60p in change and a bus pass was the complete kit needed to have fun, make friends and influence others from the ages of 11yr to 15yr.  Even thou we did hang around in gangs,  mischief without malice was the main event each evening, eventually ending in being  chased by the local Bobby PC Milner and his understudy PC Phuller, in and around the pretty village and woods we grow up in,  the achievement highlight of a successful “rate good night”.

 Our much loved friends and role models within our gangs, mainly etched into our memories forever due to the pure entertainment of there stupidness and misfortune.   Each street- christened with the  usual ridiculous nickname examples such as Wizz, Speedy and  Dye.  They didn't have much to live up too in gangster reputation,  from our respected elders whose names all seemed far more ludicrous, such as Suck Egg Steve, Wack or Silver shoes, this was a far cry from the gangs and gangsters in other cities, if we where a London suburb for example we would probably have a cool postcode as a gang name, however it's not East side it's Edding and we tend to sum up naming our surrounding areas with witty unimaginative names like” Ratville”for the small mining village Reddinshaw,2 minutes out of Edding.

On a typical cold , wet and drizzly Saturday night in the midst of winter, over a favourite treat of wine followed quickly with bread & olives at our grown up youth club.  An upmarket country bar & bistro to everyone else.  Surrounded by tables occupied by the school acquaintances who had managed,  since leaving main stream education,  to multiply or even change there name by marriage to "The One".
*The one” being him who hung around a little too long,  after a one night stand,  a far cry from the one-love of my life they portray to be with on social media.

Myself and Amber settle in on a comfy sofa next to a roaring fire to discuss what has just happened. This is how all our conversations start but what falls out of our, lipstick glossed too perfection mouths can clearly not be made up. There's no way you could possibly think of that kind of detail. So in brief welcome on a roller coaster tour of the most memorable tales so far of our twenties and thirties, that always start with a glass of wine and a sympathetic here to help gleam in our eye.