My precious baby Stephen... I gave birth to you - not much more than a child myself.
Only 4 weeks and 5 days later, you passed away peacefully in my arms and every day since, I reflect on those precious days when I nursed and held you close.
I clearly see your angelic face framed by soft, dark hair that once drew everyone’s attention.
The emptiness and pain of never being able to embrace and nurture you again in this life has become tolerable over time, but it never diminishes.
I chose your name because I loved the way it was spelled and pronounced. I wish I could call and hear your name daily, speak about you and hear you, as I do with my living children.
Though naturally born of a generous weight and perfectly covered, your little heart was weak and your breaths grew fast and shallow.
Still, the smiles you bestowed during your final days, remain unforgettable and something that no-one can ever steal from me. I never forget the first time you smiled at your little yellow duck, my heart melted and my eyes brimmed with tears. That same little duck was tucked into your arm when I viewed you for the very last time on this Earth.
Eternally I feel your presence, for everlastingly our hearts are immortally attached and I sense the connection to your divine, warm soul through the eyes of Danielle, Lisa, Brad, Lyla, Rocco, Valentino and Rocco. Your spirit forever lives on within us.
My guardian angel, with you I feel confident and have faith. I pray to you often and you never fail to respond. You watch over and keep us safe and wherever I roam, I smile at every rainbow that appears before me for I know you’re just on the other side.
My baby, I am blessed and cherish those thirty three days we shared in this life following the nine months of nourishing your growing form within my body, carrying you with love, pride and devotion. You taught me so much my darling and I would never be the person I am today if not for you. You came to me for a reason.
Before drifting off to sleep at night, the same closing words are repeated, “Goodnight my little man, mummy loves you so much” that I whispered to you at the time you took your last breath.
Love forever and always
Stephen: 28th May 1979 to 30th June 1979