Tainted Beauty

       I watched small clouds of steam escape from my lips and listened to the crunch of delicate white crystals under the soles of leather and fur. The blood-curdling scream of silence continued to echoe through the sleepy wood, but nothing seemed phased by it except for me and the now unfamiliar person next to me. I glanced in his direction long enough to meet his honey colored eyes, and suddenly found the tops of my boots fascinating.

       Kicking bits of charred rubble that was still slightly smoldering, the eeriness of "Winter Wonderland" playing in the distance caught my attention. "This is definitely not a 'Wonderland'..." I muttered under my breath.

       Accidentally making eye contact with my silent companion yet again, I sighed in frustration and immediately looked away. "I'm sorry..." I said aloud.

       "Why are you sorry?" I figured this question was rhetorical, and decided not to answer. "You're not the one who poured gasoline on my floor, or lit the match. You're not the one who didn't stop it from growing bigger. You're not the one who listened to the screams of my family members when the orange and red danced on their skin throughout their attempts to save me." I looked in his eyes, and saw the projection of a scared adolescent staring back at me.

      "Seph, you didn't mean it..." 

       "Yes I did... I just didnt mean for them to get in the way. I should be dead. They shouldn't have even tried to stop it. I should be dead." At this, I threw my arms around him while something wet ran down my cheek and onto my lips, making me taste salt.

      "No... Please don't say that." Seph pushed me away from his body.

       "Why not? It's true." I saw a glint of something metal in his hand as he raised it to his neck. "I can finish what I started." 

       "NO!" I raised my voice this time, shaking furiously from both the frosty wind that was nipping at my face and the fear I felt for Seph. I saw red taint the blanket of white at his feet.

       I watched as he lowered the sharp metal from his neck and took a few paces in my direction causing me to stumble back a few steps as well. 

       "Seph... You're scaring me..." He kept advancing towards me anyways. "Seph... Please don't do this." He stopped and stared at me with terror as his hands shook. Dropping the pocket-sized weapon into the white powder, he dropped to his knees.

       "I'm sorry, Avril... I'm so sorry..." I tried searching his face for answers to his actions, but his long hair made it impossible. 

       "Seph, look at me." I knelt to become level with him, wrapped my arms around him, and just let the salty water pour from my eyes. 'I love you' were the words that danced through my mind, but never found my lips. 

       I regret not saying those words even more now as my best friend lay dead in my arms.