too late

february 14th 

today was a good day i spent it with Ryan or my significant other, as i call him.  We don't do the whole 'boyfriend' and 'girlfriend' thing because actually i'm not a girl and hes not a boy. Although things can be hard when you've transitioned and Ryan being a big youtuber/blogger there's hate, i would never trade it because i have Ryan by my side. i can be who i wanna be do what i wanna do.

God, Ryan is so amazing and with him i'm happy.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

i closed my diary,tears spilling down my face as i stared at the gravestone before me.

it read,

'Ryan was loved by everyone and was a true inspiration in showing the way that he could completely change himself for the sake of his own happiness"

All of that was completely true.

i looked back at my diary. 

Ryan was amazing but i never told him enough.

i was happy.

Was ryan?

now

 Ryan's gone when i could have just asked the questions 

checked he was alright

but i didn't and those hateful individuals behind their keyboards and computer screens won and its not fair

but what can i do now?

ITS TOO LATE