I wish..

I wish i knew what to do with my life. 

I wish that i knew what career i wanted to go to and succeed.

That seems to be a question mark in my mind because i thought i wouldn't be here right now 4 years ago due to my mental illness. 

So right now i am unsure about the future. 

I have always lived from day to day so i could see what is next but i never planned my life out for the next 10 years. 

I didn't even think i was going to get into college cause i was called stupid in elementary school so i believed it. 

I didn't want to but now it is a word i use to define myself i am a stupid person even though people might not think so its just engraved in me. 

So i don't know what to do. 

I just want to help people because i feel like i can do a lot for those suffering from what i suffered from and still am. 

They just need someone to talk to and i want to be that person who gives them all my time just so they can at least smile through even their worst days. 

But that doesn't seem to be a option due to being pushed into Business by those who pay my tuition. 

Sometime i feel like there is no point to wishes because in the end they never come true.