Lost at sea?

           (I am your wife, not
            a graveyard for empty sorries)

In the beginning there was
nothing moving,
all still till we met,
melted to one in dark waters.
           (I cannot be your stronghold, always)

In these waters time began to exist. I was becoming,
aware of your skin in this dark womb,
skin that vanished, leaving me utterly
alone,
though I was not aware by words.

I seemed (lifelong) lost in a sea,
adrift on hidden currents,
tiny turtle alone in the deep,
dreaming me to believe the waves
hallowed.
             (there was no light by moon)

For too many years I let time unhinged
in inner darkness, cold to myself, henged in guilt
             (you did not steal his life)

In that sea there could be
no fire.
             (but by my smoke I will be pythia
              break the seal, wake you)

to find our wyrd-lock had unwittingly ruled
            (our marriage).

Now I begin finding my tears,
pearls screaming black loneliness from the sea floor,
muted by absence of light (yet dawn has come),
but for real: they are a gateway into the henge
of empty shells I built.

Hear me, if I dare,
see me, if I can find my self,
the way in marks the path out
unfreezing time into

we’ve become
more open (
now we’re closer