a driving test from hell

Alright, picture this: We're in the middle of a bustling DMV.
There's a lady here, she's about as old as the Dead Sea Scrolls,
And she's gearing up for her driving test.
Now, she's got glasses so thick, I swear she can see the future with them,
But the present? Not so much.

So, she climbs into this car, right?
It's one of those cars that's seen more life than a cat with nine lives working overtime.
The driving instructor, he's this guy who looks like he's seen it all,
But trust me, he hasn't seen anything yet.

The engine starts with a cough and a sputter like an old man waking up from his afternoon nap,
And they're off! She hits the gas like she's trying to escape from Alcatraz,
And the instructor's face goes white like he just saw a ghost, or worse, his tax bill.

They're zooming down the street, and it's like a scene out of a silent film, only it's loud, real loud.
She's honking at pigeons for crossing the road, swerving around imaginary obstacles.
I mean, if there were an Olympic event for creative driving, she'd take home the gold!

At one point, she mistakes a roundabout for a merry-go-round.
They're going in circles, and the instructor, he's praying to every deity he knows.
He's about to grab the wheel when she yells, "I've got it, dearie!"
Like she's Mary Poppins, if Mary Poppins had a lead foot and a need for speed.

They narrowly miss a mailbox that, I kid you not, jumps out of the way.
It's like the mailbox has a survival instinct.
And then, there's a squirrel. This squirrel, he's just minding his own business,
Probably planning his day, and suddenly, it's an action movie, and he's the star.
He does this acrobatic leap, sponsored by Cirque du Soleil, I'm sure.

Finally, they make it back to the DMV, and the car, it's got a new dent or two, or ten.
The instructor, he stumbles out, kisses the ground,
And looks up to the heavens like he's been given a second chance at life.
And the lady, she's beaming, proud as a peacock.

It's a day at the DMV that no one's gonna forget,
Especially not the instructor, who's probably going to retire early
And move to a remote island where the only wheels are on bicycles
And the only engines are in blenders making margaritas.