A Letter Came Home......

A little tongue in cheek poke at a subject close to the mother of every primary school child in the U.K.

A Letter Came Home......

Oh why did I let my kids go back to school?
"It's the right thing to do" I thought, like a fool.
A mere three days into the brand new term,
my youngest began to wriggle and squirm....
Out came the medicine, game, set and match,
Thread-worms extinguished before they could hatch!

A letter came home the very next day,
about worms 'rarely spreading' in school this way.....

Several days passed without trouble it seemed,
I wondered if p'raps things could be as I dreamed?
But alas, that evening, whilst eating our tea,
the youngest began to scratch vigorously!
Out came the lotion to douse her poor head,
wails met the news she must wear it to bed!
Washing the hair of a child woke too soon,
is about as successful as touching the moon....
She's off to school 'clear' after this second fight,
with a 'council house face-lift' from bunches too tight.

A letter came home the very next day,
about nits 'rarely spreading' in school this way.....

Not even twenty four hours went by,
before I awoke to a pitiful cry....
I leapt from my bed grabbing towels as I ran,
instinctively knowing, as only mums can.
As usual I got there a fraction too late,
I helplessly viewed this vomitous state....

.......My child, by it's armpits, clutched aloft,
me, terrified every time she coughed,
was unceremoniously dumped in the bath,
as I, once again, trod the 'cleaning up' path.
Five hours later I've had my fill,
But my child is finally peaceful and still.
Exhausted, I gratefully lay my head,
when a voice whispers....."Mummy I poo'ed the bed."...

........My child, by it's armpits, held aloft,
me, treading drips in my carpet so soft,
was unceremoniously dumped in the bath,
While I railed at God "Are you having a laugh!!!"

A letter came home the very next day.
about bugs 'rarely spreading' in school this way.....

I have to admit, I'm immensely relieved,
because who, if not teachers, must be believed?????