A Letter I'd Never Send

hey you,

i don't know why i'm writing this. 
what masochistic desire plagues me so much that i should speak to you again?

you probably don't even think of me anymore. it didn't seem like i was that important to begin with, seeing how you moved on so easily. 

but i think of you. 
less than before, 
but still... 
you cross my mind. 

the way you ended us 
plays in syndication in my memory, 
sponsored by the ideal
i had imagined for us... 
for myself. 

an ideal you were not interested in.
and that's alright. 
i see now how wrong it all was. 

fire and water. 

we couldn't help it. 
your flame quenched, 
while my tide swelled. 
none at fault but the stars. 

and yet night fell 
in salty streams 
from my enflamed eyes, 
far too long. 

i hope you are well. 
i hope you are happy. 
i hope he gives you 
what i never could. 

and thank you 
for the pain,
the experience. 

because now that i've stopped loving you, i have so much more left for myself.

sincerely,

me