A wrinkle in time...a love story by Jude kyrie

i caught him looking at me
i held his glance
perhaps a moment too long.
he was with a young woman
no more than twenty.
he could not be older than 25 
i thought.
i found out later he was 22

hes too young for you
way too young.
let him go my wise
old mother said.
but I didn't

instead  I took him home
 to my little piece of new york. 
 that was mine.
I. kept him there as mine..

what surprised me the most, 
was that I fell in love with him.
i thought I was too jaded for that.
He could just just touch my cheek
 with his fingertips, 
and I undressed for him, 

hungry to give him all he needed, 
refusing him nothing.
I think I was more lonely with him
 than without him.
 I knew I was but a
passing fancy.

But I loved him, 
I ached for his youth
 his beauty his innocence.
I came home early from work.
he had a young lady in our bed.

I did not make a sound, 
just watching them,
it seemed so right.
but my heart was shattered.
 and in truth so much later
it still is.

He left taking his video games
 and a small suitcase,
and the biggest piece of my heart.

 I threw him out,
 together with the remnants 
of my broken heart.

He came back a week later.
he said I was an idiot,
I love you.
I undressed for him as always.
he took me to my bed.

he would not wear his condom.
I want you to have my baby
 he whispered.
The tears flowed from my eyes.

I cursed the malevolence 
of time and space.
But I saw the trap,
I had set for him.
and I  had to set him free 
despite my anguish.

I just wished he had said
 I want to. fuck you honey.
but he didn't

it was about six months later 
I was having a glass of wine
 with my friends.
it was close to Christmas 
and new York
was cold and frosty.

he wiped the window
 clear of the frost 
of the winters bite.
 causing a porthole

 I looked up 
from my glass of wine
.and smiled back 
at his beautiful face.
 he waved
an air kiss my way.

As I reached the door
 I saw him walking away,
A lovely young girl 
no more than twenty
 hung on his arm.

She held him close 
in an embrace
 one that I knew 
was so right.

And he never 
noticed me looking
 at him under the lamp light.
or even saw the tears 
that filled my sad eyes.